I don't. (With thanks to Clementine Ford.)

I've read so many great books lately. Despite making a living as an editor (and having a sense of the constant stream of new ideas pouring into the world) I'm always pleasantly surprised to be exposed to points of view I hadn't previously encountered or considered. It's also fun, and intriguing, when multiple books coincidentally explore similar ideas, maybe across multiple genres. I want to recommend three books I've read over the past month:

I Don't: The Case Against Marriage by Clementine Ford (non-fiction, history/polemic)

Wifedom: Mrs Orwell's Invisible Life by Anna Funder (non-fiction, biography/musings)

The Engagements by J. Courtney Sullivan (fiction with a touch of history)

A little background about why these books feel so influential. In the 1980s-channelling-1950s household I grew up in, marriage was the only 'career' option for a female. (Never mind that it required no qualifications and was unpaid.) Girls in my family were not educated, not prepared for a working life outside the home; we were supposed to be 'married off' as soon as possible, preferably (to quote my dad) to rich blokes who could support him in his old age. Ha. I was a smart kid but somehow let myself get sucked into the vortex of doom. I was engaged at 19, married at 20, separated at 22 and divorced at 24. Did I expect that my marriage would be till death did us part? Well, yes, I did. If Mr Wrong hadn't been so thoroughly, utterly wrong for me, I probably would have tried to stay married. So, in a way, I'm grateful it was such an unmitigated disaster! I've been with my current partner, Andrew, for over 32 years. We're not married and never will be. That's not to say we're not committed to each other. But there's no need for a legal contract to say so.

Clementine Ford's book was revelatory as it clearly spelled out the case against marriage. That the institution is not about protection, it's about control. Her meticulous research provided insights into many aspects of relationships and the law, past and present. Anna Funder's book looked at the same issue but by examining one woman's experience of marriage: George Orwell's wife Eileen O'Shaughnessy, brilliant in her own right but largely erased from history due to her subordinate role as wife. J. Courtney Sullivan's novel weaves together five compelling stories to explore the changing nature of marriage over six decades.

I'd never quite shaken that idea, instilled by my parents from a very early age, that one had to be married. That being married was the pinnacle of life achievement and that the unmarried were somehow lesser beings. Happily, Clementine Ford's book managed to snap me out of that outdated and frankly ludicrous idea. Hopefully forever!